Anything that will help solidify the relationship.
Share a warm greeting. Congratulate someone on a recent accomplishment. Offer up something that may be of interest that doesn’t take too much of the recipient’s time. Maybe you saw an article or a video they might find helpful. If you want to pass it along with no obligation to read or watch it, that’s great. Simply focus on building the relationship.
Think about how you react when people immediately start pitching business to you — what I call spamming — right after you’ve connected on LinkedIn or other social media platform. More and more, it happens before the connection itself. Now I simply decline those requests. It’s clear as soon as I accept I’ll be bombarded with offers for services I don’t need right now or requests for meetings I can’t do right now, if ever.
When I first left the corporate world to start my own business, it was financial planners who contacted me. Now it’s people pitching lead generation services. Recently someone claimed they can guarantee story placements in major media outlets. As someone with an accreditation in public relations, I can say it’s never possible to guarantee a media placement. Maybe they were really pitching paid advertising.
Learning from what not to do, there’s a better strategy.
What is it?
Let Your Goals Guide You
Consider your professional goals for the coming season, quarter, or year. Do you want to get a new job? Position yourself for a promotion? Find great new talent for your team? Get asked to be on a non-profit board? Be invited to speak?
Write down your goals, and then identify who can help them become reality.
If you want a new job, create a list of job types of interest, both at your current employer and other companies
If you want to be promoted, consider who, in addition to your boss, will have a say in the decision
If you want to find new talent, think about the skill sets you’d like to find to round out your team
If you want to be invited to be on a non-profit board, identify specific causes and organizations of interest
If you want to be invited to speak, think about where you’d like to speak and who might hire you to do so.
Next, look to the people associated with the group and organizations you identified. Who do you already know? Who would you like to get to know? You can use the search feature in LinkedIn to further refine a list of people of interest.
Raise Your Profile with Key People
After that, create a plan to raise your profile with the people you identified. Start by sending a personalized LinkedIn request. Say why you want to connect and what interests you about them. Follow them on Instagram, Twitter or YouTube … wherever they spend most of their social time.
Then keep an eye out for content they share. Scroll through your feeds once or twice a week. Read or watch what they post. Start to engage with their content in a meaningful way. Comment on something that stood out to you. Share how your thinking has changed or what you might do differently as a result. Offer up additional data points or perspectives. Do it in a helpful way, and not to try to show you’re smarter or more informed.
The secret is to find the right balance, not engaging so frequently that you become annoying, or so infrequently that you don’t make any lasting impression.
The best outcome is to start building a mutually satisfying relationship. It’s ideal to build one where the other person enjoys and even looks forward to your comments. And one where the other person is positively motivated to engage in a conversation with you.
Find the Strategic Serendipity
Another way of thinking of this is called strategic serendipity. By engaging with and helping people in your network with a positive approach, you never know what good things might come your way.
In my case it’s been social media consulting clients, business and leadership coaching clients, speaking engagements, and teaching opportunities. Exactly zero of them resulted from my searching through social media, cold pitching services to people I don’t know. Instead, they came as the outcome of being helpful, in a targeted way, consistent with my top goals.
To make it easy to fit this into your busy life, you can create a note in your smartphone of people you want to make a point of engaging with. Set aside a few brief times each week to scroll through your social media feeds and interact with their recent content. Be as helpful as you can. Make it easy and enjoyable to engage with you. And let the strategic serendipity flow.
How have you built relationships in positive ways?
August is the Sunday of summer. So said a chalkboard sign I spotted by the beach a few years ago.
And so true. It’s bittersweet when summer comes to an end. The longer, more leisurely days start getting shorter and filling up with more commitments as Labor Day approaches.
Businesses and teams have year-end goals to meet. Children are back in school. Maybe the Sunday Scaries are staring you down as you head into Labor Day.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. During a last-minute summer getaway, I learned something important. Maybe it will help you, too.
Although it’s summer, it’s been an intense season with two fledgling businesses in our household – mine and my husband’s. I realized I was putting life on hold, so I headed to the Eastern Sierras for a few days. A mini-retreat, I called it. Or a working vacation. Or working remotely.
Whatever it was, it was delightful. With the backdrop of mountains, trees and summer breezes from my desk, I worked on some of my big projects, did client calls, and dipped into the flow state of being completely consumed by what I was doing, oblivious to the passage of time.
The Lingering Project
One of my projects has been on my list for the better part of a year. As a new author of What Successful People Do in Social Media, I know I need to build an email list of subscribers. I even created a free workbook to accompany my book as a reason for people to sign up.
But I ran into a roadblock in the spring, figuring out how to integrate the MailChimp email service with my download document on this WordPress site. I did research. I leaned on the chat and email service functions of the various providers. I reached out to experts to see if someone could do it for me.
And completing this project has been standing in my way. As much as I talk about the need for everyone to have a social media strategy for their career, I also emphasize the importance of owning your own online real estate.
That means your own website where you control everything. That way, an algorithm change on a social media platform doesn’t impact your ability to connect with your community.
And it was standing in the way of my next project — turning my book into an online course or series of courses. If I don’t have an email list of devoted fans who are interested in what I have to say, it’s much harder to launch a course.
I even did a workaround on my free workbook. Not wanting to delay to release of my book in April, I simply put a note on my website that people interested in the workbook could email me to request it. It wasn’t the most efficient or elegant of solutions, but it enabled me to keep moving forward.
One of the lessons I’ve learned over the last year of launching my own business is to fight the oppression of perfectionism. It’s hard to balance a standard of excellence with taking it too far and delaying, as marketing guru Seth Godin would say, shipping the work.
Learning the Way
My last day in Mammoth was my day to tackle my website. The night before, I decided to refresh my WordPress knowledge by completing an online class called WP Savvy by Iglika Mateeva-Drincheva.
It came in a group of online classes called the Entrepreneurship Bundle. And it’s thanks to Marissa Stahl that I learned about it. She’s the COO of Something Social LA along with founder Callie Cholodenko. Marissa and I met through the USC Alumni Association earlier this year.
The bundle of 31 classes had a special offer for $99, so I thought, why not?
As life often gets in the way, though, I didn’t complete many of the classes right away. Has this ever happened to you?
But what a lifesaver WP Savvy turned out to be. Even after a few years blogging on my WordPress site, I learned several new things from Iglika’s course. And I felt re-energized to tackle the email integration issue.
Figuring It Out
The other inspiration came from Mark Cuban, the business leader and investor on Shark Tank, among other things. He gave a talk at my former employer’s headquarters in the early 2000s.
As the head of communications at the time, my job was to play host while he was onsite. He had driven all night from Texas to Los Angeles to speak to our employees, but he was full of energy.
And I’ll never forget what he said. In the early days of his business, he said they’d be in client meetings, taking in what the client wanted, and telling them they could deliver.
Later, Mark and his colleagues would look at each other and say they had no idea how to do what they’d just committed to. But they had all night to figure it out. And figure it out they did. Time and time again.
If they could do it, so could I.
Figuring it out in this case took a lot longer than I planned. I had to figure out the original email list subscription I started with wasn’t going to work. I had to download existing subscribers and move them to a new platform. I set up the sign up forms, the welcome forms, and the thank you forms. I tested them by subscribing myself. The look and feel still isn’t great yet, but that’s relatively easy to fix.
The Breakthrough
What I couldn’t figure out was how to make my free download available to subscribers. After some web searches, I decided to start clicking through every screen on WordPress to see if I could find something that would work.
And I finally found it. Buried six screens down, in the middle of the page. Even though I wasn’t selling a product, I wondered what would happen if I checked a box that said “enable shop with the plugin I’m using.”
VOILA! That was it. Which was mentioned exactly nowhere in all the online materials I consulted. Or perhaps it was there, but I missed it, which is entirely possible.
The point is, I told myself I would spend whatever time it took to resolve the problem. I was not going to let up until I figured it out.
It now feels like a huge weight is lifted from my shoulders. So many other actions depend on this, and now I can move forward. It’s a release of positive energy and momentum.
I’m going to tackle part two over Labor Day weekend, which is a long-overdue new look and feel for my website. That way, when Sept. 3 rolls around, I’ll have a big project behind me and I can truly move forward with my big goals for the fall.
What’s Holding You Back?
My question for you is, what’s on your list that’s holding you back? Could you devote a morning or an afternoon of your Labor Day weekend to tackle it? Or at least start the process? How much would that jumpstart your fall season? Would it help you greet it with energy and enthusiasm?
I bet it could. And there will still be plenty of time for being with family and friends, celebrating the last of the summer season, and recognizing the social and economic of achievements of American workers on Labor Day.
In thinking about the value of work, I’m inspired by author and poet Maya Angelou, who said, “Whatever you want to do, if you want to be great at it, you have to love it and be able to make sacrifices for it.”
What do you love to do?
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Here’s how to join my email list (on the left-hand column) to get a free copy of Your Social Media Success Roadmap. You’ll also get an email update from me once or twice month with tips about boosting your career through social media.
“I’m in the process of changing my brand. I love what I do and I’m thinking about creating some new avenues for myself. I would love to get your thoughts. Let me know if you have some time to chat.”
“I appreciate your latest blog post, as it makes me contemplate my own situation. I think I’m making a difference in my work, but I’m under appreciated. I know you were in the corporate world for a long time, and I truly value your opinion.”
“I’m trying to figure out what to do next in my career. I’m focused on survival where I am, while feeling a bit of imposter syndrome. I want to make sure whatever it is I choose to do next is totally worthwhile. What do you think?”
These are a few samples of different notes I got this year from different people in different roles at different companies. Yet for all the differences, there’s a definite theme.
People ask for my advice on making changes in their professional lives. Whether it’s moving up where they are, shifting direction into a new area of interest, or clarifying if they’re really doing what they want to do, the obvious pattern finally hit me.
People want to know how to successfully navigate change, sometimes reinvent themselves into someone new, and make their professional lives more fulfilling.
Finding a Perfect Coach
Early in my corporate career, I wanted a coach. I was intrigued by leaders in business, sports and the arts who had coaches helping them be their best. I wanted one too.
I was looking for someone who could guide me in making difficult decisions. I wanted someone who could help focus my efforts. I was eager to achieve my initial career goal of becoming a VP of Corporate Communications.
But how to find one? It couldn’t be just anyone. It had to be someone who I felt a strong connection with. Someone who I felt really “got me.” Someone who could help me figure out the next steps on my path and nudge me in that direction.
The law of attraction came into play. It often does when you declare an intention, mentally file it away, and then subconsciously take steps toward it.
When I was a communications director in the early 2000s, my supervisor gave me an opportunity to attend a week-long leadership development program at the Center for Creative Leadership.
To say it was life changing is a major understatement. Along with fellow participants, I completed multiple leadership assessments, joined team-based activities to further uncover our leadership styles, and got one-on-one coaching.
My coach turned out to be the person I’d been looking for and more. We had an incredibly intense afternoon session. It uncovered some of my deepest fears and called into question many of the beliefs and assumptions I had let guide my career to that point.
At the time, I was struggling with integrating an ambitious corporate career with being a loving parent of two young children. I looked around the company and my community and didn’t see a lot of role models who were combining both. I felt isolated and alone, not to mention overwhelmed. I was almost ready to leave the corporate world to focus exclusively on parenting.
The only problem is that would have been a disastrous choice for me. My leadership profile is one who likes to be in charge – planning, building and orchestrating large-scale activities. (In the Myers-Briggs personality inventory, I’m an ENTJ, affectionately known as “the commander.”) I needed to figure out a way to make the work/life situation work for me, my family and my career.
And that’s what my coach helped me come to see. I was so happy with her guidance that we worked together for seven years. Sometimes I had a boss who approved a company payment for her services, and sometimes I paid on my own. Because it was just that valuable.
Either way, the impact was incalculable, both for me and the company where I worked. Within two years, I achieved my goal of becoming a VP of Corporate Communications. And I accomplished other important goals as well, although some still proved to be elusive.
Reaching a Painful Inflection Point
Fast forward another seven years and I found myself in another difficult place. “Bored and burned out” was how I described myself to a new coach. A life and leadership coach, Tina Quinn had long been someone I admired in my community. We connected through a friend who was trying to help me move forward with my life.
For a time, though, I resisted meeting with Tina. I just didn’t want to go there. I didn’t want to confront the issues, because that would mean making a change. And change can be painful.
Although the funny thing about change is that in retrospect, I can say that every major change in my life has ultimately been a good one.
We began with my one-year goals and an assessment of my energy leadership, a tool that surfaced how I viewed my work and my life. From there, Tina and I explored ways I could change my view of the world and consciously choose to show up differently.
It’s thanks to this work that I’m where I am today. I’m still striving toward newer and invigorating goals and dreams. And I have a set of tools to better show up in the world and make the journey a more joyful one.
Navigating Waves of Change
In reflecting on change, I’m grateful for some of the changes in my own life. After a few difficult early years in the work world, I chose a new career in corporate communications and took a series of steps to get there.
When another employer was acquired, I had the opportunity to move into marketing analytics. And while I didn’t choose that role, it did give me the view of marketing I wanted.
More recently, I made the leap from the corporate world into the entrepreneurial life. I’m not sure I would have been able to take the steps I did without everything I learned in working with a coach. Talk about a life lesson in feeling the fear and doing it anyhow!
Along the way, I always enjoyed the opportunity to inspire and uplift others. One way I do that is through speaking.
One of my favorite volunteer roles in a philanthropic group called National Charity League was being the inspiration chair. I opened each meeting with encouraging words and stories to uplift fellow parents, professionals, and community leaders.
And my corporate roles gave me opportunities to help others with their development. It was deeply gratifying to put together the first-ever leadership development program, a week-long experience for top executives, at a former employer.
Later, I got to work with HR colleagues to create a marketing leadership development program, to develop future-focused skills among high-potential marketers.
When I was launching my business to write, consult, speak and teach about what successful people do on social media to build their careers, some of my colleagues and friends suggested that I offer coaching as well.
At first I resisted. It didn’t seem core to what I was doing in the social media space. And back to my ENTJ profile, I confess that sometimes I like being the field marshal, organizing and directing a team toward a common goal. Coaching felt a little bit behind-the-scenes to me.
And yet …
The requests kept coming. One of my first social media clients told me how excited he was to be getting social media advice and coaching all in one. Several other people wanted to bounce ideas off of me.
And I found I loved our conversations. It was energizing to help people solve problems in their work lives. I enjoyed asking questions that could help people see new possibilities for themselves and begin taking steps to get there.
Which is a long way of saying that I’m launching a new service with leadership coaching. The focus? Successfully navigating change and transition to achieve big goals.
Introducing a Coaching Practice to Help You Navigate Change
What does a coach do? There are many definitions. An especially good one comes from the International Coach Federation. ICF defines coaching as “partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.”
Moving up to the next level of performance and responsibility
Managing life as a high-performing leader and a dedicated parent
Leaping from the corporate world to the entrepreneurial life
If you’re contemplating how you can change, reinvent and transform your career, I’d love to hear from you. We can work together on a short- or long-term basis, depending on what you want to accomplish.
If it involves reinventing your personal brand, we can couple our work with a customized social media plan to launch and build your new brand.
And wherever you choose to navigate your career, I’m wishing you all the best on your journey!
That panel name grabbed me at Social Media Week Los Angeles and wouldn’t let go.
As a perk of being on the faculty in the Social Media B.A. program at FIDM, the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising, I got to go with my students. (Opinions expressed in this post are my own.)
Along with the department chair Tom Henkenius, I enjoyed the conference and its sessions on storytelling, influencers, AI, gaming and more.
But why did the session on fun jump out at me? Well, maybe because the last several months have been intense. I completed project after project, racing from one to another in rapid succession, without breaks in between.
Yes, it was exciting to publish my first book, give a TEDx talk, work with clients, and develop a social media consulting class for FIDM.
Yet the intensity of so many projects at times left me yearning to take a short break and recharge. I wanted to do something fun. But I couldn’t think of what that would be. Literally nothing came to mind.
Maybe the dictionary could help me. Fun is defined as, “something that provides mirth or amusement, enjoyment or playfulness.”
But I still had no ideas.
Wait, what?
Which is likely why the Social Media Week session on fun stood out. Usually when I face a problem, I assume it’s unique to me. It’s something to figure out on my own.
But this session painted a picture of a societal problem. “Modern life is really good at taking things that used to be fun and, well, making them NOT fun,” the session description began.
“Real fun is built on spontaneity and surprise, opening up possibilities for experience and memorable moments,” it continued. “Social media was largely considered fun when it first boomed in pop culture. So, what happened?”
Holland Martini and Bevan Mahaney of Grey talked about bringing the fun to life. It was based on Grey’s research study, the Famously Effective Business of Fun.
We learned some sobering stats:
the U.S. ranks #18 in the world on happiness
people rate fun as number 5 out of 9 options
people are doing “fun” activities for reasons other than fun, like reading for their mental well-being, working out for physical health, and going on social media just to pass time.
Ooof.
The problem, they said, is we don’t know what’s fun anymore.
Apparently, we are collectively experiencing a dearth of fun. It’s not just me. It’s many of us. It may be you. Or someone you know.
Holland and Bevan then related those findings to business. It turns out that “50% of people are more likely to consider or purchase a brand if they knew a brand could help them have more fun. And 76% would spend more on that brand.”
So, not only is fun good for us individually, it’s also good for business.
Holland and Bevan had valuable strategies for bringing fun back to social media:
Create supportive communities for like-minded people
Provide shareable, memorable cultural currency
Give people canvases to enjoy life.
From my perspective of social media as a career booster, here’s what I would add. These are three things that make social media fun on a professional level for me. Maybe they will for you, too.
Yes, this does introduce a “good for you” aspect, beyond having fun for fun’s sake. But fun can foster an environment where people feel happier, more connected, and more creative. Fun has a unifying feel-good element that can help bring more enjoyment to your professional life. And there are echoes of my post on what to do when social media gets you down.
First, encourage others to have fun at work. Who says anything you do can’t be more fun? How could you make it more fun and enjoyable? Whether you’re a team leader or an individual contributor, you can share fun ideas and make them happen. Celebrating a big accomplishment, coming together for people’s birthdays, bringing in dinner when the team is working late on a project, and making a point to laugh and be silly at times can help a team bond and have more fun.
One of the most gratifying experiences for me in the corporate world was fellow colleagues laughing and bantering together as we worked under significant deadlines to put out a communication or make a big event happen. Enjoying the high points of our work and the celebration afterwards made it all the sweeter.
In these moments, you can encourage your colleagues to share their experiences on social media in a work-appropriate way. It amplifies the joy and shows how work can be fun. Images and emotions can be contagious, so you just may be contributing to making the world a more fun place to be.
Second, share the fun in what you’re doing professionally. Just because work can be intense doesn’t mean that you and your team shouldn’t enjoy the process and have fun in the process. Making a point of sharing those fun moments on your social media can increase the good feelings among your colleagues, amplify your employer’s brand, and encourage others to make their workplaces more fun.
Recently I spoke at a Town Hall meeting for a former colleague, Kim Keating, at AT&T. (Again, opinions expressed are my own.) Kim leads a data science team, and she wanted to better equip them to share on social media about what it’s like working at the company. My talk was covered how to tell your professional story on social media. Everyone I interacted with made the process simple, easy, and yes, fun.
Third, learn something just for the fun of it. It’s a quiet Sunday morning as I’m writing this. I made this morning a “Pajama Sunday” where I read for pleasure. I paged through some digital and print magazines, reading whatever I wanted, not what I thought I should read for professional purposes. And I started reading a new book: Joyful: The Surprising Power of Ordinary Things to Create Extraordinary Happiness by Ingrid Fetell Lee.
Maybe you learn by reading, or by watching, or by listening, or by doing. What do you want to know more about, just because it would be fun? What really intrigues you, even if it seemingly has no relevance to your professional or personal life?
Go delve into that. Share what you learned on social media. Maybe it will brighten someone else’s day or give some much-needed insights.
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Writing this post was (mostly) fun. It has to be, or I wouldn’t spend so much time doing it. In a happy coincidence, this is post #200 since I launched this blog more than four years ago. Clearly, this is a joyful activity for me.
In Vancouver this month to speak at a conference for communicators, I took a morning stroll through the scenic, seaside Stanley Park. I dipped into some “forest bathing” and felt refreshed by nature. I jumped on a swing for the sheer fun of it.
And now, because it’s a beautiful summer Sunday, I’m taking my bright red, beach-cruiser bicycle to a repair shop to get it in shape for the season. There are few things more fun than a leisurely bike ride at the beach.
Photo of Cynthia Dillard, Kathie Frasquillo and Mallika Siegel by Jessica Sterling
Social media is in the headlines a lot these days. And not always in a good way.
As I shared in my TEDx talk this spring about lifelong learning, social media gets a bad rap. It saps our attention. It makes us depressed. It polarizes our world.
Scrolling through our Instagram, Facebook or LinkedIn feeds can be a trip down the rabbit hole of comparison hell. None of us can ever measure up to the carefully curated feeds of people and brands we see every day.
Unless …
… we remember that the only competition is with ourselves.
… we remember never to compare others’ outsides to our insides.
… and most importantly, we remember a great power of social media.
And that’s the power to lift others up. To rejoice in the accomplishments of others. And to use our voice on social media to amplify their good deeds.
On Administrative Professionals’ Day this spring, I was inspired by a post from Anne Chow, a senior leader at AT&T and someone who always inspired me when I worked there. She lauded her administrative assistant and how important she was to the her and the team.
And that made me remember I had some great pictures of them from my corporate farewell event (thank you, Jessica Sterling). It was the perfect confluence of factors to post a thank-you message on LinkedIn.
Seeing the community of comments and appreciation that sprung out of it was truly gratifying. What a boost for all involved. Suddenly, my day felt brighter, and hopefully others felt the same.
It was the putting into action one of the concepts in the book I published this spring, What Successful People Do in Social Media: A Short Guide to Boosting Your Career.
In my book, I talk about the social media trifecta. What’s that? It’s bucketing your social media content into thirds:
The first one is sharing what you’re doing in the work world.
The second one is amplifying the great things your team or your colleagues are doing.
And the third one is being a brand ambassador for your organization.
In this way, you don’t over index on promoting yourself and potentially turning people off in the process. You build goodwill with your colleagues and your team by highlighting their good works. And where it makes sense you share the good work of your employer.
As spring soon gives way to summer, I reflected on some of the social media posts that made me rejoice in what colleagues and friends are doing ..
My former boss Fiona Carter is now leading the #SeeHer movement to bring equality to and eliminate bias in the way women and girls are portrayed in advertising and media.
My friend Tina Quinn published a fabulous book this spring called Invisible Things. Tina coached me through some difficult times a few years ago and she inspires me every day.
My former colleague TeNita Ballard is doing so much to make the world a more inclusive place, especially for veterans and people with disabilities.
And an amazing thing has happened just as I’ve reflected on all of these special people and what they’re doing in the world. I feel uplifted. I feel inspired. I feel happy for them.
And the way for me to share that feeling is by engaging with their social media content, by liking and commenting and sharing their good deeds.
This spring has been difficult in many ways. Yes, it was the thrill of a lifetime to give a TEDx talk and publish a book and help my husband Kevin with the launch of his new restaurant this summer (Pacific Standard Prime in Redondo Beach, for those in So Cal).
But it’s been challenging shepherding my son through his last few months, weeks and days of high school. Like seniors all over the country, he’s beyond ready to move on to the next thing.
In his case, it’s a bit of a different path. He’s been “scrimming” (practicing) with two esports teams in League of Legends. Now when he’s sitting on the couch with his headset on playing a video game, he’s actually doing a job and getting his first paychecks.
Our world is changing so quickly, it can be hard to keep up. But if the happiness I feel right now in thinking about friends and colleagues is any indication, one way for you to find happiness is to look for the good in others and amplify it in social media.
In this workbook you’ll find 50 questions, actions and ideas to help you build your career through your social media presence. The workbook gives you space to jot down your answers and ideas to the prompts that appear in the book.
Social media is increasingly the way people get great new jobs, build vibrant professional networks, establish themselves as thought leaders, and become lifelong learners.
Successful people use social media to effectively boost their careers. They define their personal brand, pick where to play in social media, build a broad and diverse network, consistently share content about their professional interests, and give back to help their colleagues and companies succeed.
To download your free PDF workbook, sign up in the top left-hand column of this website.
It’s definitely on mine. TEDx talks are independently organized under a free license from TED. This global speaking platform gets its name from a 1984 conference where technology, entertainment and design converged.
So many great TED talks have inspired me that I was eager to try to do the same. I spoke often in the corporate world and in the community, always enjoying the opportunity to impact people’s lives in a positive way.
But where to begin on a TEDx talk?
For me, it started with listening to TED talks during drive time. Then I read TED Talks: The Official Guide to Public Speaking by TED curator Chris Anderson. And I went to TEDWomen and got to see speakers up close.
As this blog took shape as an exploration of how people boost their careers through social media, I started sketching out ideas for a talk. Here’s what I learned on the journey.
Landing your talk. Convinced that my talk, Why Everyone Needs a Social Media Strategy for Their Career, would be of interest to just about anyone (oh, the folly of my thoughts), I applied to speak at a local event. I watched previous talks at the event and linked the “idea worth spreading” in my talk to the proposed theme.
But there was no response. Not even a rejection email. Just … nothing.
Of course, I finally realized, it’s like applying for a job. It rarely works to apply online. Your application just goes into a black hole from which it never emerges.
It also reminded me of one of my life mantras: don’t apply for stuff. Instead, let people find you. They tend to be more interested that way, and you don’t have to do as much convincing (aka, selling).
What happened next? An acquaintance was kind enough to introduce me to the curator of another event. We jumped on a call. It did not go well. I hadn’t prepared in the right way. My idea fell flat.
For a while I let this simmer on the back burner.
One day I checked Messenger. There was an intriguing message from Sara Robinson, someone I knew from our local community. Her daughter’s service learning leadership class in high school was putting on a second annual TEDxYouth event. They were looking for inspiring speakers. Sara said she thought of me.
Was I interested?
Um, YES!
The official term for what happened might be called “inbound marketing.” It’s all about sharing content in different ways. Ultimately, that content may interest people in coming to you. Blog posts, YouTube videos, articles, speeches and more would fall into this category.
In addition to this blog, I was the inspiration chair in a group called National Charity League. At the beginning of each monthly meeting, I gave a short inspirational talk. I wanted that role because it was a difficult time in my life, and I thought I could inspire myself by inspiring others.
Of my various community roles, this was an all-time favorite. And I never dreamed it would lead to the chance to give a TEDx talk. Which just goes to show you never know where actions you take today might lead in the future.
You don’t have to know how you’re going to make a dream come true at the outset. You just have to declare to yourself that you will do it. Somehow. The “how” will make itself clear as you begin to take steps toward your goal.
Creating your talk. TED talks are about ideas worth spreading. Each talk is about a single idea. You have 18 minutes or less to tell the story of that idea.
My original talk was about why you need a social media strategy for your career. The feedback I got was that it sounded like a sales pitch. While that was not my intent – what I wanted to do was equip people with the tools to do it themselves – it was helpful to know that’s how it came across to one curator.
When the TEDxYouth opportunity came up, it seemed like the ideal audience to pivot the focus. Teens use social media to stay in touch and share who they are. What they may not consider is that social media can be a powerful – and fun – way to learn throughout their lives.
That became my idea worth spreading: how social media can make you a #lifelonglearner. Access to anything you want to know is no further away than the social media apps on your phone. You can learn about any topic you choose, learn about the social media platforms themselves, and help others learn about you. A transcript of the talk is in a previous blog post.
Getting feedback on your talk. The iterative nature of the TEDx process is something that’s ideal for all speaking engagements. I did an initial read for the students on the TEDx committee almost two months before the event. We were packed into a small office adjacent to the main classroom, with the students sitting on the floor and me presenting from the notes on my iPad.
The next session was an evening presentation over dinner with all the speakers. There were six student speakers and two adults – me and a well-known English teacher and softball coach. We created small groups after the presentations to give each other feedback. I was impressed by the caliber of the speakers and how much heart and soul they were putting into their talks.
After that, we each came to class two more times to deliver our talks. With every visit we got additional ideas and suggestions. It was an incredibly thorough way to do it. We all improved our talks with continuous feedback and iteration of our talks.
And we all benefited from the great leadership of Heather Myrick. She initiated the school’s service learning leadership class that raises awareness, promotes compassion, and takes action in local and global communities. She had incredibly insightful feedback for each speaker, along with much encouragement.
Memorizing your talk. Memorizing a 1,700-word talk is no easy feat. It surely would have been faster in my college days, when I was used to cramming large amounts of material into my brain right before finals week. But with the passage of time and the sheer volume of information we encounter on a typical day that takes up precious brain space, memorization proved difficult.
I tried recording my talk as a video and listening to it before I fell asleep. Research says this is a good way to make information stick. The various sleep cycles are supposed to solidify the learning. I also tried listening to the recording during drive time.
But what ultimately worked for me was repetition, repetition and more repetition. I’d memorize one paragraph by repeating it aloud multiple times as I paced across my office. Once I had one paragraph down, I’d add the next one. Eventually I worked up to a page. Then two pages. And three pages. Ultimately I got to all four pages.
I must have repeated that talk 200 times, and I still didn’t feel like I fully had it. I felt like if I paused during the delivery, I’d forget where I was and be unable to remember the next line.
What was it that made it fairly simple to deliver the talk while I was driving in my car, while taking the stage introduced a whole new level of challenge?
The difference really was the thought of being judged. Yet I had to remind myself of what I often coached others on in the corporate world – people in the audience are rooting for you. They want you to succeed.
Talking yourself off the ledge. Procrastination is a problem for me. My tendencies toward perfection make me put off tasks and the emotional pain of not feeling like I’m measuring up to the standards I set for myself. Of course, this just compounds the problem, because then there isn’t enough time to create something as good as I would like.
When I finally deemed my talk almost good enough to share with my family members, the actual event wasn’t that far off. I felt like they were underwhelmed with my delivery, to say the least. To their credit, they had some great ideas and suggestions.
The problem for me was that it was difficult to memorize my talk in the first place. Now I was going to need to rewrite areas and re-memorize it. But then I remembered a great conversation between two TED speakers on a podcast called The Tim Ferriss Show.
In an episode on overcoming fear and embracing creativity, Susan Cain and Tim Ferriss talked about their experiences preparing for the TED stage. In each case, some late-breaking feedback caused them to make last-minute changes to their talks. The pressure was intense. Yet the end results made their talks all the better.
Having insight into others’ experiences helped me talk myself off the ledge, along with some much-needed encouragement from my husband, Kevin.
Enjoying the experience. The day of the event I must have run through the whole talk about 50 times. Or at least it felt that way. Yet when I would think though specific sections, my mind would often draw a blank. I started to freak out a bit, wondering if I’d be able to remember and deliver the whole talk.
I call these moments the speeding train syndrome. That’s when you’ve done a tremendous amount of preparation and the deadline is looming, but you never feel fully prepared. At that point, there isn’t that much more you can do, because the train will continue speeding along toward its destination.
This was when I decided I had to surrender to the timeline, do my best, and try to enjoy the experience. If not for me, then for the sake of the audience. As a TEDxYouth event, the size of the audience was limited. But I was thrilled that my husband, our two children, our daughter’s friend (both serendipitously home for spring break from college), and one of my friends were able to attend.
We were going to have some fun together. That’s what I told myself as I walked onto the stage and took my place in the middle of the TEDx red circular carpet. And I think we did! The parts where my family members had given feedback and suggestions were the moments that inspired some laughter from the audience.
Amplifying the experience. One moment I was waiting in the wings, ready to go onstage, with butterflies in my stomach. Then I stepped onto the stage, into the light. And I began.
Before I knew it, I was done. I remembered my talk as I’d practiced it time and time again.
What next? The first thing was to offer encouragement to the speakers in the green room who would follow me. It was a sight to see a group of people individually pacing the room, practicing their talks.
The next day I shared my talk transcript in a blog post. I wanted to reach a larger audience after the weeks, days and hours of effort in fine tuning it into an idea worth spreading.
And I wanted to share the experience with you, if this is a dream of yours too. If you have an idea worth sharing, there are TEDx events all over the world. I encourage you to seek one out and share your idea. The world needs you!
Giving a TEDx talk has long been on my bucket list. This week, I’m over the moon that I got to give my talk. It was a riveting road, full of twists and turns as well as ups and downs.
The down part was two nights before my talk. I was practicing on my captive family members, not loving how it was coming together, and bargaining with myself about how to get out of doing it.
The up part was being on stage. I delivered the 1,767 words I wrote and painstakingly memorized, and I fully enjoyed the experience of sharing a message that’s near and dear to my heart.
In my next post, I’ll give some insight into the process of being part of a TEDx event. And I’ll thank many of the amazing people who helped make it happen: Sara Robinson, Abby Robinson, Heather Myrick, and my family and friends.
The school’s Service Learning Leadership class organized and hosted the second annual event. The class raises awareness, promotes compassion and takes action in local and global communities. My daughter loved it so much she took it for two years.
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Social Media Can Make You a #LifelongLearner | March 22, 2019
The last time I was on this stage, there was no Spotify, no Instagram, no Internet.
As a sophomore in high school, I was not an aspiring actor, but a school play needed French can-can dancers doing a kick line. My dance group, Choreo, was invited to join the cast.
At the time, I never dreamed I’d return to this stage, on a completely different mission. Instead, I was consumed by questions you may have about your own lives as teens.
Where will I go to college? Will I enjoy it? What kind of work will I do? How about a family? If the term “bucket list” existed then, I would have wondered about that, too.
Imagine being in high school before smartphones and social media existed. It’s impossible, right?
But because I didn’t grow up with social media, learning to use it was like getting through a locked door without a key.
My job in the corporate world was VP of communications. One of my projects was bringing a form of social media to the workplace. Everyone creates a profile, forms teams, and works together in a social space.
This was my first real introduction to social media. Sure, I joined Facebook … kicking and screaming because a “friend” made me do it.
But the new project scared me. People on the tech team were throwing around words like “hybrid cloud,” and “on prem.” I had no idea what they meant. And I was the project leader.
At the time, Mindy Kaling, the entertainer, was on the cover of Fast Company magazine.
I felt like it was silently mocking me for everything I was not. I didn’t know what I was doing. I wanted to crawl under my desk and hide until the project went away.
But that didn’t happen. As you do when there’s something you don’t want to work on, I had to kick my fear to the ground and move forward through that hybrid cloud.
Launch day was looming. One morning I woke up and decided to start a blog.
If I needed to teach others how to do it, including our CEO, it might be helpful if I knew how to do it for myself.
I wrote about what I knew, the workplace, in posts like “Writing Irresistible Emails,” and “Failure is the Secret to Success.”
And I loved it – conversing in comments and connecting people across time zones.
When I didn’t know how to do something – like hyperlinking to an article – I just asked my readers. And they responded.
By experimenting and being willing to make mistakes in a public way, I learned valuable new skills.
Later, I launched a blog outside the company, writing about how people build their careers by using social media to tell their stories.
In part, I was intrigued by colleagues I’d never met in real life, but I felt like I knew them and their work through our social interactions.
One of the them was Sandra, who worked in another state. During our project, she shared content, posted comments, and encouraged others to use the platform. Although we never met in person, I saw her leadership in social media.
A few months later, Sandra’s name came up in a talent review. This is where team leaders discuss everyone’s performance. It’s similar to a teacher giving a grade in school. When we talked about Sandra, I had good things to say about her, all because of her social presence.
A study by Dell and the Institute for the Future estimates that 85% of the jobs that today’s young people will do in 2030 … have not yet been invented.
If this is even partly correct, in just over a decade, many of today’s jobs will be replaced by new and different ones. That’s a lot of learning!
A favorite of mine, Thomas Friedman, says that today’s American dream is more of a journey than a fixed destination. He describes the feeling as walking UP a DOWN escalator.
The only way to master it is to become a lifelong learner.
How do you do this? I believe the answer lies with two questions.
Who has a smartphone in their pocket?
And who used it today on social media?
Think about the impressions you saw. What you shared. How it made you feel.
Social media gets a bad rap. It saps our attention. It makes us depressed. It polarizes our world. And don’t get me started on the YouTube comments section.
The Pew Research Center says that teens especially can feel overwhelmed by social media drama. You can feel pressured to post content that gets a lot of likes and comments.
I didn’t know I was supposed to delete Instagram posts that didn’t get 50 likes in the first hour, until my daughter told me. My early grams got about 4 likes. Good thing I didn’t know the rule.
But there’s an upside that doesn’t get this kind of attention.
Social media helps us learn. In new and different and fun ways.
Because learning isn’t over until you’re over. It’s forever a work in progress, no matter how many academic degrees you earn.
Access to anything you want to know is on the apps on your phone … for Instagram and Snapchat and YouTube. There’s also Twitter and Facebook and LinkedIn … the network for professionals sometimes known as the spinach of social media. More on that in a minute.
By applying some strategy to the content you consume, you can get a degree in life – every day.
The impressions in social media – the stories, the tweets, the snaps – can be a powerful learning system. Social media can make you a lifelong learner in three different ways.
First, you can learn about any topic you choose.
Maybe you want to know more about technology. What’s the latest on artificial intelligence? Augmented reality? Robotics? How are they being applied to business or the arts or social good?
Maybe you want to learn about which media outlets you should trust to report the facts. Or about data science and how it helps companies decide what products to offer and which people to hire.
To start, you can find the leading experts through Twitter – or Instagram, LinkedIn or YouTube. You can follow their feeds and view what they post.
You can connect with almost anyone on social media. Commenting on someone’s content or asking a question can often start a conversation. Sometimes I do this with authors and podcasters.
You could try this with your professors when you get to college. You could do this with leaders at a company where you work, especially if it’s hard to meet them in person.
You never know if they’ll reply. People who seem really accomplished are often accessible on social media.
Second, you can learn about the social media platforms themselves.
You can learn about the algorithms that determine who sees what posts. You can study the psychology of online behavior. You can get to know how advertising works and influences you.
You can then use this to your advantage. For example, as my son told me, to make an unwanted ad go away, say for lava lamps, just search on “I hate lava lamps” a few times. No more ads.
Why else is this important? Because social media is a topic you can perpetually study but never master. Two writers, Guy Kawasaki and Peg Fitzpatrick, say the term “social media guru” is an oxymoron, because nobody really knows how social media works.
“No matter how smart you are,” they say, “best practices always change, because the platforms change how their sites work. Everyone needs to keep experimenting.”
I took that advice to heart. In one of my experiments, I posted to LinkedIn every weekday for a month to see what would happen. I was curious to test the data point that it takes 20 LinkedIn posts to reach 60 percent of your audience.
I put my data into a spreadsheet to analyze patterns. I wrote about it, and people wanted to know more. They started asking questions and inviting me to speak.
Third, you can help others learn about you.
A top skill of the future is making yourself known. It’s communicating who you are and what you do in a world where you’re often changing jobs.
In every impression you post in social media, you’re telling your story – like Peninsula High School Service Learning Leadership does here. You’re building your reputation, also known as your personal brand. You’re sharing what you’re doing to make the world a better place.
What’s not recommended is the humblebrag – a boast wrapped in fake humility that makes people want to facepalm when they see it. No one wants to hear just how hard it is to choose among multiple Ivy League acceptances.
What is required is getting on LinkedIn, the network for professionals. This is where you share what you do and what you want to do in the work world. It’s your always-on, 24/7 resume. It’s the way you tell your professional story.
A college admissions officer might look at your profile – especially if you put a link in your application. It’s also a way for people to find you. A job recruiter might contact you, possibly because your dream job wants to slide into your DMs.
People will come to know and trust you. Posting positive impressions lets you manage transitions and successions in life more easily. If social media had existed throughout my own life, my transitions would have been easier. I could have learned faster and shared more about me.
When I got to college, I quickly realized I was in the wrong place. So I transferred to a new school. I got a degree in economics because it seemed practical. I worked in early jobs I didn’t like very much.
Then I got a master’s in communications and found work I loved. I married a great guy and started a family. I worked at a dozen different jobs so far, from a fast-food cashier to a corporate vice president to a business owner today.
Were there ups and downs? Yes. Doubts if it would all happen? Absolutely.
But remember that scary social media project? It turned out to be one of the foundations of my business.
What made this happen? Learning. Growing. Experimenting. Every day.
This is why we all need to be social seekers – of new knowledge, perspectives and experiences.
I was going to publish my book today. Life intervened. As life often does.
It reminds me that many cliches are true. Or at least they have a kernel of truth in them. Otherwise they wouldn’t be cliches.
Sayings about life and about writing have been ringing in my ears much more these last few months.
Life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans.–Allen Saunders, John Lennon and perhaps others
There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.–Ernest Hemingway
The art of writing is the art of applying the seat of the pants to the seat of the chair. –Mary Heaton Vorse
So, what’s been happening in my life these last few months? In a nutshell, it’s been an incredible and an intense kaleidoscope of highs and lows.
I had the opportunity of a lifetime to say farewell to the corporate world after many wonderful years and start my own business. I write, research, consult, speak and teach about what successful people do in social media to build their careers and companies.
It’s incredibly exciting to build something from the ground up. So much needs to be done and created out of thin air. A name. A trademark. A limited liability company. A book. A group of fabulous clients. A TEDx talk to give soon. A class syllabus to complete. And the list goes on.
My son also started his senior year in high school. That brings a lot with college applications and big questions about what’s next for my League of Legends grand master player, the top 500 players in North America. (Really. People with access to a League client can find him at “ExodLa”)
My mother-in-law needed more help managing her life last fall, so I stepped in with other family members and picked up her finances. Sadly, she passed away in December. As she said shortly before that with courage and dignity, “ninety-one years is a pretty good run.” Indeed. We miss her every day.
My husband Kevin is opening a restaurant, and I’m his marketing person. My marketing and social media plan for the best new steakhouse in Redondo Beach, California is done, and now it’s all in the execution. Exciting, yes. Easy, right? 🙂
My daughter asked for help last night picking her spring quarter classes in college. If only I could recall – or quickly find – the graduation requirements for psychology and literature. But it was fun to talk about the pros and cons of childhood or adolescent psychology and Victorian or 1960s literature. There’s even a lit class (as in “literature,” not the Urban Dictionary def) about the TV show Jane The Virgin. Sign me up!
My mom was ready to replace her iPad and we waded through all the options together (iPad Pro? how much storage? which keyboard?) to find what would work best for her. I’m so excited all of her new tech goodies arrived and she’s having a blast.
Every day for the last week, we had the whole family and many helpers on deck to prepare my mother-in-law’s house for sale. It’s the first time it’s on the market in 50 years. All I will say is that’s a lot of clearing and cleaning.
The fourth truck from the junk haulers pulled away from the property just 45 minutes before the photographer arrived so the house could be listed that evening. The backyard is pictured above, by the way. The serenity is a much-needed contrast to our 21st-century lives.
It is strange to feel incredibly blessed and completely overwhelmed all at the same time. Much of it has to do with how I like to live my life. I love being surrounded by fascinating people and interesting projects and big problems to solve.
As one of my former bosses, Joe Bosch, used to say, “Caroline, I can see your fingerprints on everything.” I think (hope?!) he meant that in a good way. I see connections between people and projects and ideas, and I like to bring them all together.
But what happens when life gets so overwhelming that it reaches the breaking point? One of the questions I’ve been struggling with is how to get my book published and how to share about it in social media. That means I also struggle with wanting everything to be perfect … or as close to perfect as it can be.
Let’s start with the easy parts. First, the book is written. It’s just about ready to become available as an ebook and in print (not that it was easy to write, but the hard part of writing and editing is done). It’s called What Successful People Do in Social Media: A Short Guide to Boosting Your Career.
Second, I know I’m supposed to be sharing more about my book on social media before it launches. But I also want the content I post to be as good as it can possibly be. And that takes time.
This is where I have to gently remind myself to just get it out there. Even if it’s not perfect. And when I’ve done that these last few weeks, I’ve been so humbled and heartened by everyone’s response.
It also reminded me that perfection is boring. It’s what puts people off rather than brings us together in our shared humanity of imperfection. We never truly know the challenges others are facing.
I can only imagine the labyrinth of issues you will navigate today. My heart goes out to you and wishes you courage and strength to work through it. And also that you might enjoy and cherish this wild and crazy experience called life and all of the wonderful people in it.
This year I came up with five mantras for how I want to feel and act every day. When I start to get spun up about this or that, I remind myself of them. Here they are:
These might lend themselves to a future blog post, to fully describe what they mean and how they shape my days. But for now I’ll simply say from personal experience that the way to keep going is to be kind to yourself and others.
Recognize you’re carrying a heavy load. You don’t have to do it alone, and you don’t have to be perfect. Just be kind to yourself and others. Be committed to taking steps to move forward every day, even if you can’t complete the whole project you had in mind right away.
I hit some inevitable bumps in the road, and I made adjustments. I’m excited to say my book is coming … in March instead of in February (or last December or September) as I originally planned. I’m so excited to share it with you and with the world. I hope it will help you be all you can be by telling your special story on social media.
To wrap up, here are some of my other favorite quotes about life and writing that keep me moving forward …
Start before you’re ready. –Steven Pressfield (big ups to Tina Quinn for telling me about his book The Artist’s Journey)
Don’t wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to work.–Pearl S. Buck
You can always edit a bad page. You can’t edit a blank page. … and … You don’t love someone because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.–Jodi Picoult
On my seemingly endless “to do” list, I had a note to publish a blog post before the end of February. Where was I going to find the time? I wasn’t. So I just decided to sit down this morning and write what was in my heart … guided by the principles of striving to be as positive, upbeat and helpful as I can.
So there you have it. The secret to being active on social media when your life is bursting at the seams is to just take the next step forward. Give some thought to what you could share about your own experience that could help your friends and colleagues on their journeys.
What are your secrets for sharing on social media when your life explodes?
What’s the #futureofwork and how will it shape your career in 2019?
That was the subject of a Facebook Live for USC alumni I moderated this week. Fellow alums Dr. Terri Horton, a workforce futurist, and Jennifer Zweig-Dwomoh, an executive recruiter, shared their expertise and insights.
We began with a look at how AI – or artificial intelligence – is being used in the recruiting space. We talked about what candidates should know about ATS, or applicant tracking software.
Using keywords in your application is a must. Take a look at the job description and make sure the keywords in it are reflected (appropriately, of course) in your application materials. The goal is to pass through the ATS screening and start interacting with a person.
Even better is to skip the online application process entirely and tap into your network. Who do you know who works at the companies of interest to you? A warm introduction from them to a hiring manager or recruiter can accelerate your candidacy.
Top jobs and skills for the future
We talked about the top jobs and skills that employers are looking for today and in the future. The World Economic Forum has a few valuable lists in the jobs landscape for 2022, starting with data scientist and AI and machine learning specialists.
As someone who writes, consults and speaks about what successful people do in social media to boost their careers, I’m personally happy to see sales and marketing professionals on the list. But that doesn’t let me off the hook to continue to learn and grow.
Portions of some jobs may be automated via AI, which means many jobs may evolve and be reimagined. And while some job types may go away entirely, new jobs will also appear. It’s wise to keep an eye on the landscape, evaluate the changes, and adjust your career focus and learn new skills on an ongoing basis.
While many of the future-focused jobs are tech-related, there’s also a rise in emphasis on soft skills. Creativity, collaboration, critical thinking, empathy, innovation and resilience, to name a few, are increasingly important. These are the skills that machines can’t currently perform.
How social media can accelerate your career
We looked at how social media can help you with your job search. A consistent focus on building your LinkedIn network with everyone you know – and everyone you want to get to know – is critical.
Then work on your LinkedIn profile. Focus on your headline, your summary, and your work experience. Make sure they’re saturated with the keywords that reflect both your experience and where you want to go next. This makes you more discoverable to recruiters, hiring managers, and others who might have interesting opportunities for you.
Your profile picture is also important. Be sure to upload a clear picture of your face, ideally smiling, closely cropped, and in the attire appropriate for your industry.
Don’t use the default background image in blue with lines and dots. Take advantage of a personalized background photo. A photo of you in action on the job or a picture of your geographical location are a few starter ideas.
Companies are looking for you in a strong economy
We also talked about the state of the economy. With unemployment at a nearly 50-year low, companies want to hire you. That creates a vast array of opportunities for you. This is an ideal time to consider your next move, whether it’s in your current company or at a new one.
Just be sure to be the professional that you are, treating everyone with respect and not burning bridges. You never know where or when your paths will cross again or what shape the economy will be in.
We also talked about newer graduates and how they can start building their careers. With freshly minted degrees, their skills are in high demand, so that can be leveraged. It’s also never too early (or too late) to begin building a “platform” – a few social media channels of choice where you both create and curate content.
Reimagining work and reasons for optimism
In our 2019 world, while change as fast as it is happening can be scary, there are plenty of reasons to be optimistic. The 2018 Future of Jobs report by the World Economic Forum predicts that AI and robotics will create almost 60 million MORE jobs than they destroy by 2022.
How can you take advantage of that? The main takeaways from our conversation were to keep learning every day, stay flexible and agile, and embrace the reimagining of work.
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