by Caroline Leach | Sep 30, 2021 | Leadership, Work/Life
“To innovate, you need to lighten your load. Constantly.”
Thanks for that, Danielle LaPorte. Her quote appeared this week in my 2021 planner from the same inspirational luminary.
It felt like it appeared for a reason. As an important reminder. It matches a sticky note I put on my desk lamp a few weeks ago. It says, “NO is the answer.”
As I’ve been running around in an ever-escalating frenzy of deadlines and to-do’s, I stopped for a moment and reflected on my calendar.
After all, our calendars reflect our priorities.
And mine reflected some “scope creep.” By that I mean, commitments had made their way onto my calendar that didn’t match my highest priorities. I’ve been striving to be helpful, and to give back, where I felt I could. But in the process, I was – and am – depleting myself.
That’s no way to live a vibrant life.
So my default response is now “no.” Is this difficult? Yes? But it’s far preferable to have so little time that I can’t meaningfully connect with the important people in my life, or do the work I enjoy, or even get a full night of sleep.
On the other end of the spectrum, I also loved Shonda Rhimes’ book, The Year of Yes. She spent a year saying yes to things that would have otherwise scared her. There’s an important distinction, though, between activities that lead to growth, as in Shonda’s case, and activities that lead to burnout.
So for now, no is the answer. In my next post, I’ll share some ideas for how to say no in a way that honors you and your recipient.
What do you need to say no to?
by Caroline Leach | Aug 31, 2021 | Leadership, Work/Life
A question from a 2011 diversity conference I attended is especially haunting now, 10 years later. Fareed Zakaria, speaking at the PwC event in Washinton, D.C., asked, “do you ever feel like you’re living in a Third World country?”
At the time, it seemed so preposterous. But even then, he gave examples that resonated. More than occasional power failures. Less than optimally maintained roads. Shortages of key supplies.
A decade later, unfortunately, his question seems more on point than ever.
It took three months this summer to get a new washer and dryer at home. The power goes off frequently enough at our house that I open the garage door well in advance if I have an especially important event to drive to. Our rescue dog needs an ongoing medication, which can take anywhere from two days to two weeks to get a refill. There’s more, but I’ll stop here.
And that’s just the personal side. The professional side often feels equally chaotic. And let’s not get started on the many distressing news headlines, such as military actions, climate change, and the pandemic.
Short of stomping around the world angry all the time, what can be done at the individual level?
Here are three strategies for navigating through chaos …
- Be kind to yourself and others. Essentially, most people are struggling right now, for a variety of reasons. Asking people how they’re doing, genuinely listening to their response, and offering support go a long way. Extending the same grace to yourself helps too.
- Build in extra time. Don’t wait until an appliance or a prescription or a relationship is on its last legs. Put in for the renewal well ahead of time. That way, there’s plenty of extra time for the inevitable bumps in the road. There’s time for recovery.
- Balance standards and completion. Not every task has to be done to 100% perfection. Identify what needs to be completed at a certain standard, and what is good enough. Subscribe to the mantra that “done is better than perfect.”
How about you? What are ways that you navigate chaos?
by Caroline Leach | May 31, 2021 | Change, Work/Life
What’s on your mind as the unofficial start of summer arrives this Memorial Day weekend? As we emerge from 15 months of pandemic-induced staying at home?
As a coach, I’m often collecting interesting questions to ask people. One of my favorites came from someone in a coaching class through the Co-Active Training Institute. The question is: what’s an area where you consistently let yourself down?
On long weekends, we often have time and space to pause and reflect on our lives. What’s going well? What could be improved? And even more importantly, what’s an area where you consistently let yourself down?
The answer to this last question might hold the key to what you really, really want from your life. Your thoughts might surface wishes and dreams that often get forgotten and overlooked in the rush of our busy lives.
For me, where I let myself down is living too much in the future and not enjoying the present, in my rush and zeal to get stuff done. What’ I’d like to do is enjoy the present moment (now that I’ve finished a morning’s worth of work on this holiday … ha!). What is means is I’m going to go read a chapter or two in a new book I got from the library (which after a year of drive-through book pickups is now open to go inside!). Then a bike ride around the neighborhood. And some time with family tonight, reconnecting and and enjoying each other’s company.
What’s missing in your life? Where are you letting yourself down?
Right now is the perfect moment to put yourself first. Do what your heart is calling you to do.
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