Photo by Caroline Leach
“Look, talent comes everywhere, but having something to say and a way to say it so that people listen to it, that’s a whole other bag … there’s one reason we’re supposed to be here is to say something so people want to hear.”
So said the tragic character Jackson Maine, played by Bradley Cooper in the magnificent 2018 take on the timeless story in the film A Star is Born.
These words spoke to me because of what many people have essentially expressed in one way or another as we talk about building their professional reputations in social media. That’s the focus of my blog and my new business.
The theme, the pattern, the refrain … is fear. Fear of doing the wrong thing. Fear of looking silly. Fear of not mattering.
But let me start at the beginning. Needing to replenish my own creative well, I went to an early screening of the movie before it officially opens. I was loosely riffing on author and screenwriter Julia Cameron‘s concept of an artist date.
While I’m religious about Cameron’s practice of morning pages – three pages of longhand writing first thing every morning as a way of clearing the mind’s cobwebs, solving knotty problems and setting the stage for the day – I’m not as dedicated to artist dates.
An artist date is an hour you take by yourself every week to do something that brings you joy. It could be walking through a park, visiting an art supply store, or going to a museum. It could be anything really.
The point is to spend time filling yourself up with new and different experiences. Cameron calls it “restocking the well.” Then you have more to give through your art, whatever form that takes … as a writer, a painter, a singer, a professional, a parent or any role you play in life where you creatively express yourself in some way.
Because I’m so goal oriented, an artist date is tough for me. I don’t always feel like I’m accomplishing something important. I’m not checking something off my never-ending list of things to do.
Yet launching a new business, while over-the-top exciting, also leaves me feeling depleted at moments. Significant creative task after creative task starts to take its toll.
I have to remind myself why people say Rome wasn’t built in a day. It’s not possible to do everything at once, as much as I want it all to be done … yesterday. I need some balance. Some new perspective. Some fresh ideas.
So I went to the movies with my husband. And some of the character’s lines crystallized and organized the patterns of what I’d been hearing from several different people. Yes, it’s true that there’s nothing new under the sun, but this powerful film brought a fresh take to a story for the ages.
And it’s really the story of all of our lives. Why are we here? What are we doing? And what do we have to say?
So here’s what I have to say about pushing beyond the fear of doing or saying the wrong thing in social media as you build a career or a company.
Keep your heart in the right place. It’s hard to do something bad or wrong if you truly have good intentions. If you’re coming at social media from the perspective of generosity – sharing what you know and what you believe with the goal of improving people’s lives in some way – you’re on the right track.
If you jump into social media with a spirit of reciprocity, engaging with others in a positive way, you’re not likely to make a misstep. And if for some reason you do, you can listen to feedback and continue a respectful dialogue.
Consider how people might perceive what you have to say. Could it inadvertently cause pain? Could it be misread? Heather Rim, a chief communications and marketing officer, said it well in a recent profile: “Be sure the content of a post can stand alone without being misinterpreted.”
If you have second thoughts after you share something – if you view it in new ways that others might see it – you can always edit it. I’ve done that on occasion with some of my blog posts. After the fact, I realized something I said could possibly be misconstrued. That’s easily changed and updated.
Experiment and try new things. Social media algorithms and functionality are changing all the time. So are we as human beings and as works in progress. Sometimes the social media content we think is our best doesn’t resonate with people the way we hoped. Other times, content we think is just okay becomes among our most popular. The important things are what can be learned from it and what can be done differently the next time.
To experiment freely and effectively, sometimes you have to silence your inner critic. A former colleague Val Vargas shared a brilliant strategy for this in a speech she gave to an employee resource group earlier this year. She said to give your critical inner voice a name, ideally an unflattering one. And tell her to be quiet.
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Going back to the opening words by the character Jackson Maine, they reminded me of one of my great bosses over the years. I had the privilege of working with Joe Bosch, a consummate chief human resources officer, for five incredible years. His coaching advice to me was often to be more deliberate about sharing my point of view.
That’s why I enjoy blogging so much. More easily than in a face-to-face meeting, I can shape and fine tune my point of view before I share it with people. Real-time feedback comes in the form of comments and conversations. And I can continue to edit and evolve as life does and I do.
If you weren’t afraid, what would you say?
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